“We should all do what, in the long run, gives us joy,
even if it is only picking grapes or sorting the laundry.”― E.B. White
Here are a few of the little things that gave me joy this week…
{Hot, summer sun in the city}
{Captivating dance performance}
{Oh so many popsicles}
{Unbelievably delicious & creative food from here}
{Getting ready for the 4th of July }
…What made you happy this week?
Have a lovely weekend!!
{Images by Me}
…in the old town tonight.
It’ll be in the hot & sticky 90′s here in MN for the foreseeable future. The air feels like a big, thick blanket enclosing around you…phew!
You can almost feel the heat radiating off of these beautiful & vibrant oil paintings by South African artist Philip Barlow: The City…
…Wipe the sweat away & be sure to visit Philip Barlow’s site to see more inspired works!
{Images via here}
“Summer was our best season:
it was sleeping on the back screened porch in cots,
or trying to sleep in the treehouse;
summer was everything good to eat;
it was a thousand colors in a parched landscape.”
—Harper Lee, To Kill A Mockingbird
{Click images for their source}
{Click images for their source}
…do you have a favorite summer memory from your childhood?
A few of mine:
~Climbing my crab apple tree and reading Laura Ingalls Wilder books in the branches
~Trying to capture fireflies on my grandparents’ tennis court in Ohio
~Running up & down the hills outside of church which were filled with dandelions ( I mean filled)
~Playing night games with the neighborhood kids (sardines, kick the can, capture the flag, flashlight tag…)
~Biking to my best friends house…everyday (backpack filled w/all of our secret club goodies)
~Puckered skin & pink shoulders from swimming all day…not to mention sand hiding in my bathing suit
~Camping with my family (always an adventure, usually ending with a flooded tent)
~Going to the drive-in movie theater with family friends (where our parents would hold blankets up/turn the volume down during *racy* scenes)
~Learning to water-ski…after a whole day of trying and failing I said “1 more time” at dusk and that was the magic moment…up I went!
…
{Click images for their source}
“I was smiling yesterday, I am smiling today and I will smile tomorrow. Simply because life is too short…”
―Santosh Kalwar
Here are a few of the little things I smiled about this week…
{Playing the piano…after too long}
{Rocking out to Aerosmith…love me some Joe Perry}
{Late night walks in the summer rain}
{Double rainbow…all the way (ha ha)}
{Taking my trusty Schwinn out for some rides}
…What made you happy this week?
Have a lovely weekend!!
{Images by Me}
“…I’m Sorry.”
Why is it those two, little words are not only hard to say…but also sometimes hard to accept?
This past weekend I was hoping to receive an apology from someone…
but it never came.
Hence my mind has been thinking a lot about apologies and forgiveness. I’ve been thinking back on the times I’ve needed to apologize. Was I sincere enough? What are the best ways to apologize to someone?
What do you think about these steps to an effective apology from Pick The Brain:
- Make it genuine – Anyone can spot a false apology and it will do more harm than good. A genuine apology is aimed solely at taking responsibility and overcoming a disturbance. There are no hidden obligations or expectations attached.
- Don’t justify your actions – If you are busy explaining why you did what you did, it will start to sound like you aren’t apologizing at all, that you aren’t ready to take responsibility. A brief explanation may help understanding, while a justification may just fuel the disturbance.
- Make a commitment to change – If you can’t confirm that you mean to improve, then you aren’t committed to an apology. If you aren’t committed to changing your habit of getting home late, don’t say “Sorry I am home late”. This will be a hollow and ineffective apology. You are better off thanking the other person, “Thanks for putting up with me coming home so late. I appreciate it” and taking it from there.
- Phrased you apology carefully – Make sure the other person knows why you are apologizing. “I was passing by so I thought I’d drop in and say sorry” is a lot different to “I wanted to come and apologize because I really do care about this relationship”. Don’t fake it. If you have a good reason to keep the relationship alive the other person will want to hear it.
- Be prepared for an awkward conclusion – While sometimes an apology is followed straight away by a counter apology and peace and flowers and little birds carrying banners of love through the air, not everyone reacts this way. Some people will behave indifferently, some will behave coldly, and some will react in a downright hostile way. This is out of your control. You have made the step to apologize. Doing it in a productive way is the best you can do. Maybe the other person will appreciate it now, later, or never. No matter what, you have done your bit and you can relax. The rest is up to them.
And what if you accompanied your apology with one of these actions…
1. Hug. It’s hard to stay mad when you hug someone. Physical touch can bridge the widest of emotional distances.
2. Write or find a poem showing how you feel about the other person outside of this situation. Keep it simple.
3. Give the person a list of the top 5 reasons they are important to you.
4. Create a collage of 10 photos of amazing places you’ve been together or fun experiences you’ve shared.
5. Make a donation to the other person’s favorite charity.
“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love.
In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.”– Robert Muller
Forgiving can be really difficult…especially when you never received an actual apology.
Here are some ideas to help forgive someone (even when it’s difficult) from the readers at Tiny Buddha…
- I remember them as a child and it’s much easier! -Joy Thompson
- I remind myself that I forgive not for them but for me and that it’s easier to forgive than to hang on to so much anger, hurt and betrayal. -Sarah Clark
- I just acknowledge that we are humans, so we are allowed to make mistakes. -Haydee Lizbeth Lopez Cruz
- Remind yourself that they are not separate from you; they only appear that way. Then you will realize you are one, and it is yourself you are forgiving. -Justin Hayden
- Do not keep thinking of the past or the bad thing that happened; when you let go of it, you get over the anger/bitterness that you felt and it clears the path of forgiveness! The best thing is time! -Ashna Singh
- Remember that we are all doing the best we can at the time. -Diane Paul
- Remind yourself of how much forgiveness would mean to you if it was your turn for a mistake! – Carol Mcbride-Safford
- Wayne Dwyer describes how hate is love which has been turned around. Seeing the expression of what can’t be forgiven as love makes it easier to forgive. Were also all doing the best we can, according to our own evolutionary state, including those we find hard to forgive. – Lise Heeley
- Because it takes less energy to love and forgive than it does to stay angry and hold a grudge. It brings peace to your life. -Linda Adams
- I know that I need to forgive someone, not for their benefit, but for my own peace of mind. Don’t do it for them, do it for you! -Cathryn Kent
- You remember why you love them. Love is about forgiveness.- Holly Chapman
- Forgiveness comes easier with the passing of time. I tend to find that, if I am wronged, I forgive the person before they forgive themselves, and when I am in need of forgiveness, it is I who feels the guilt for longer. -Mandy Richardson
- Stop thinking and just do it. Open your heart and forgive. -Lindsey Windrow
- Don’t force it. If I don’t feel forgiving, I can at least not act on my anger. Eventually forgiveness will come if you welcome it. -Julie Trottier
- Just learn to smile and let things go. -Sudharma Lama
- Give up on all hope of a better past. -Matt Child
- Every time you think of them send them love. After a while it gets easy. -Crystal Chang
- Meditate, meditate and meditate some more until it’s gone! -Margot Knight-Guijt
- The harder it is to forgive someone else, the more I am responsible. When I understand and forgive myself, forgiving others is easy. -Pamela Picard
- Two different approaches. One involves restoring your boundaries and sense of protection first. The other involves focusing on what your body is feeling and stop dwelling on the offense. Both involve being present. -Chris Campa
- Forgiveness comes easy when you know that what people say or do is about them, it’s not about you. -Kim Kings
- Shift the focus, feel the pain and think of the thousands of others in the world who are also feeling the same pain, then send a loving-kindness message to everyone to be relieved of this suffering. -Nick Ong
- When it happens I often ask myself “What strengths must I develop further from this?” Often the feeling of resentment just goes away, slowly but surely, because I wasn’t focusing on the person that wronged me, but the lesson that the event was trying to tell me. -Natassia Callista Alicia
- I allow myself to feel again whatever I didn’t express “in the moment” when I was with them. Forgiveness always seem to follow those (usually) difficult emotions. -Cynthia Ruprecht Hunt
- Write a brutally honest, emotionally raw letter telling them how much they have hurt and angered you, then tear it up and burn it. As you watch the smoke rise, think about the fact that you are not that hurt and that anger. It is fleeting, just like everything else. As the smoke carrying your hurt and disappointment disappears into the air, you can let it go. -Renate Wuersig
- For some wrongs, I just have to remember that they are responsible for their actions and then it is easier for me to just let it be. -Karen Garland
- By remembering that it will free me from the burden of the stress I feel, also, if I can’t forgive then how can I expect to ever be forgiven? -Leslie Brown
- Just look to the future instead of focusing on what’s past…think of creating new good memories to wipe away old bad ones. -Elizabeth Lindsay
- It becomes easy when you remember a time when you were forgiven, centering on how it made you feel. -Louisya Graves
- Understand this: whether you like it or not, over time, you will stop feeling the pain, so why hold on to something that’s going to away anyway? -Nirav KAKU
What do you think? Do you have any thoughts on forgiveness?
I’m trying hard to breathe out forgiveness…
“The forgiving state of mind is a magnetic power for attracting good.”
– Catherine Ponder
…Do you need to apologize to someone? Or forgive someone? Why wait another day to do so?
{Click images for their source}
Sorry is a question that begs forgiveness,
because the metronome of a good heart won’t settle
until things are set right and true.
Sorry doesn’t take things back,
but it pushes things forward.
It bridges the gap.
Sorry is a sacrament.
It’s an offering. A gift.”
—Craig Silvey, Jasper Jones
{Click images for their source}
